The time has come
my doctor said
to speak of many things....

... but chiefly about the fact that I will be 53 years old in a couple of weeks, and there's a certain ... procedure ... that I have not yet had.

So I chugged a gallon of that syntho-pineapple flavored Liquid Plumber<tm> stuff they use when they want your entire G.I. tract empty... *really* empty ...

The colonoscopy went fine — It was kind of interesting, actually, a guided tour of my large intestine, all the way to the appendix.  I was kind of concerned that I wouldn't remember any of that, because one of the drugs they gave me was Versed.  My previous experience with that when I had a kidney removed was that it was the chemical equivalent of the Men In Black's little flashy-thingy.  Then, my memory was completely erased, from pre-op to post-op.  I guess they must have used a lower dose, because that didn't happen this time.  The doctor found one small polyp, which he just grabbed with forceps and snatched off.  I expected to feel at least a twinge when he did that, but I didn't feel it at all.

Colonoscopies actually prevent colon cancer.  Those polyps are generally where cancer starts; remove them, and you improve your odds by a lot.

I felt only some slight discomfort as the doctor was running the scope around my innards.  The worst part is the stuff you have to drink beforehand.  It's not that it's so bad — sort of salty, plus whatever flavor additive you put in it, with a sort of "thickness", kind of like whole milk — it's just that there's so much of it... A whole gallon.  A cup at a time, every 15 minutes until it's gone.  And, of course, there is its intended effect, discussion of which would be way too much information.

I was really ready for something to eat before it was done.  You can't have anything but clear liquids — broth, jello — starting 24 hours before the procedure.  Then seven hours before, you can't have anything at all, other than finishing off the ... stuff.

With the drugs they give you, they are adamant that you must not drive, operate machinery, sign any papers, or do anything else which requires you to be of sound mind until the next day.  I didn't feel at all impaired, but the nurse told Ginny to watch me, because "he doesn't think he's drugged."

Afterwards, we went to our favorite pizza place, Willow Street Pizza in Willow Glen.